3 weeks ago I turned 45. I was dreading this birthday. It seemed heavy to me, like a turning point on a wheel that is rapidly spinning and a reminder that I still have so much to do and need to make every moment count. When my friend Angela called and asked me to host a Pampered Chef party (yes, I do occasionally buy things), I said yes and let's do it on my birthday. We invited 60 women and as I know how these parties sometimes go, I assumed we would have 4 or 5 women show up. Was I wrong. But, that's not what this post is about.
The week leading up the party seemed fairly normal with the RSVP list, then the day prior to and the day before, the RSVP's started rolling in. When all was said and done, I had about 15 women, 10 kiddos, the hubby and 2 dogs plus myself and my Pampered Chef consultant all in attendance. I'm not gonna lie. We cleaned. I mean, it's me, right? The kids and I spent part of Monday and a little bit of Tuesday cleaning and tidying the house. We put things away, swept and vacuumed all of the floors, made the beds, cleaned the mirrors and the glass doors. In other words, we did what should be done each and every week but some of these things get missed. In a couple of hours on Monday and a couple of hours on Tuesday, we cleaned the entire house from top to bottom. Mostly. There were a few things that I could have done. I could have wet mopped the hardwoods or cleaned the baseboards or wiped down the chairs.
But, we didn't and we had the party anyway, because we could.
What I mean by this is thanks to keeping a fairly organized, clutter free home, it does not take us long to literally get the entire space ready to host a large gathering.
I'll be really frank with you. We have had to remove the storm door on the front due to shattering the glass, there are two pieces of tiles broken in one of our bathrooms, our downstairs carpet needs a very good cleaning and I need to reupholster two chairs that I have currently slipcovered.
It doesn't matter. No one cared about those things. They cared about me and they cared about us. And, I decided to not sweat the small items. I want to assist you in getting your space to where you want it to be. Do not forgo your joy because of your fear of a less than perfect home. You may have a few small hotspots that need to be addressed before you achieve perfection. You may have a home that is just shy of a Hoarders episode that need the chairs excavated so you can move into joyful living. You may have something in between.
We can tackle your big problems in your home through my new program and then the small stuff won't seem as big!
My Clearing the Way Course will help you to create a welcoming space in your home for your loved ones and for yourself. It's NOT ABOUT PERFECTION. It's about releasing yourself from your stuff. It's about freedom. It's about a respite from the storms of life. If you are not sure if this is for you, email me at firstname.lastname@example.org and we can chat or follow the link below for all the goods on this life-changing course.
If you are ready to step into sanctuary, it is only a click away.
I have this dream of sanctuary. Okay, I want to be honest. I have sanctuary. My dream may be more that everyone has sanctuary. There are so many days when I drive up my driveway and walk into the front door, lay down my things and find gratitude in having this space to walk into. I think I recognize it more after working with clients and knowing that so many struggle with this in their lives.
I'm that person that when I go into people's space, they apologize. The apologize for the mess, the clutter, the disorganization. They assume that my home is perfect all of the time. Truthfully, I suppose that it is fairly clean and organized most of the time. Even the kids frequently say, "it doesn't have to be perfect, Mom!" It's not about perfection. I promise. It's not.
It's about having a place to have laughter and joy and space to dream and, unfortunately, shelter from the storms that we weather throughout our lives.
Having a clutter free home is not the answer to preventing disease or infidelity or financial woes (though it can help). It does not mean your life is perfect. But, it can be your place of ease when faced with any of these.
So, let's talk about how it can help. If your bed is filled with clean and/or dirty laundry you or your spouse are sleeping on the couch or in the recliner each night and not making a space in your bedroom for the energy of love, then it can create problems. If you are a binge shopper and purchase the same items over and over because you never emptied the bags from the last 10 shopping trips and your home is so cluttered that you cannot find items, thus purchasing new ones, it can contribute to your financial woes. What about your health? Does your home have lots of spaces for mice to live and to create waste due to the mounds of "stuff"? I promise you, if your home is severely cluttered, it's a real possibility and I have seen it in home after home after home. (Mice are a real problem in the cleanest and most orderly of homes and can easily be dealt with as the evidence can be seen, but it is amplified in cluttered homes.) What about your mental health?
Let's stop here. This. This is what I am most concerned with for SOME of the folks I work with. It's the walking in the front door to the piles, then into the kitchen where you do not have room to prep healthy fresh food, then into the bedroom with 6 baskets of laundry and no room to put them. Then, you begin the cycle of overwhelm. For some of you, you know what I mean.
I work with clients at all levels. I have clients who just need some tweaking in their space or dealing with that one hot spot. On the other end are the clients who have a home full of furniture but no where to sit as ever space is covered with things. And, of course, there is everything in between.
I am not here to judge you. It is the last thing on my mind. There are those days when I wish my own home looked like something out of a magazine. I see the door that fell off the cabinet in the kitchen, waiting to be repaired or the carpet in the den that needs to be replaced. And then, there are those days when I teach a class and show photos of my own home as examples and have people in the room say they wish their home were so empty of items and am reminded that the struggle to find sanctuary in our homes is so real.
On August 1, I am launching an online program to support you in your journey to sanctuary. I'm going to be showing you into my home, my less than perfect, but clutter free home, giving you tips and tricks, talking about why we have clutter and so much more! I know I've been hinting at this for a while, but creating a program like this takes some time!!! I'm almost ready to launch this thing and you will be the first to know. Are you ready?
Let me go back and explain some things about me. I am not a feminist. There was a time when I would have claimed that title and you can be sure that I am SO GRATEFUL for those women in our past who have worn this as a crown to allow me the freedom to be whomever I choose to be. I am a woman. A daughter, a sister, a friend, a mother, a wife, an entrepreneur, a priestess. I am all of these things and I get to choose these things. But, there came time when I no longer could say, "I am a feminist" in the way we view it in our society. I believe in gender roles (there, I said it). I believe that that MAJORITY of us fall into gender roles and are happy to be associated with our gender while some do not. To each their own, but, I am comfortable in my woman-ness and know I can be a badass woman who loves, parents, relates, and leads ferociously.
This Goddess-worshipping Southern woman chooses her own path each and every day and revels in being a W-O-M-A-N.
And, this is why I LOVE, LOVE, LOVE this movie above all others. I mean really. I am even going to see it again. An island full of warrior women. They are lovers and fighters and teachers. Diana's mother, Queen Hippolyta, is the perfect feminine archetype. She is soft and loving and wears her wrinkles like a beautiful piece of art, all while wielding a sword and shield to protect her tribe and her family. Her sister, General Antiope is the harsher of the two. Beautiful, hard, and aged like a fine wine to show that beauty is not only for the youth but those in mid-life and beyond, she has a softness for Diana and her students that is rarely revealed. I identified so much with both of these characters. Hippolyta, the leader and the mother, Antiope who teaches in much the same way as I parent, I am nearly at a loss for words and cannot get enough.
To me, this movie is everything that represents women at our best. It is the story that needs to be told. Is there a group of Amazonian women living eternally due to their connection with the gods? Well, even I don't think so. Nevertheless, this is the story of women and our abilities, it is what I didn't even know we needed right now in this moment in time. We need this for each woman from 18 to 88 and for each girl who is growing up now. I need it for my daughter to show her what she can do. I need it for my son so that he knows that women can be strong. I need it for me to remind me that being in my mid-life can be beautiful and fierce. We have needed this story for longer than I can say.
I was not going to let the Moon see the movie. It is a little more violent and edgier than we normally allow her to see. I have tried to stand my ground. But, my hubby is the one who is insistent. I don't know if he is worried about her in some way or just knows somewhere inside that the girls of this generation, in the face of where we are as a society, needs this. With this aaaaallllll said, I'll leave you with this quote from the movie:
“YOU ARE STRONGER THAN YOU BELIEVE. YOU HAVE GREATER POWERS THAN YOU KNOW.” - Antiope
I’m Dana Croy and I am a modern day mama. Balancing family and work is not always easy (not to mention a little self-care). Though being Mama to two fantastic kiddos is a huge part of my life, that was not always the case. I wear many other hats and invite to sit down and find harmony with me.