Well. You can imagine what is often on my mind. We first saw her face 3 weeks ago. We were in the middle of a SERIOUS crisis involving the sell of our home and the purchase of our new digs. I had told Nathan the day before that we would have our referral that week and it came within 10 minutes of my calling Nathan to tell him our house was not going to close.
Though we reviewed the file and consulted with the international adoption ped and we both knew we would accept the referral, neither of us had the emotional or mental awareness to click in. We sort of put the entire thing on a back burner for a few days. One we got through the move, in fact, our first day in the new house, we received an update and it all began to sink in that she was going to be ours.
Now, here we are, three weeks after seeing our little girl's face for the first time. Actually, let's go back to last night. Nathan's BFF Mark came over for dinner and I quickly got him downstairs to see her photos on the laptop. As I zoomed the photo, it hit me....my little girl is living in an orphanage on the other side of the world. The photos up close did not paint a pretty picture. I am telling myself that she is being taken care of as well as possible, but to see the state of the part of the orphanage in the photo was not encouraging.
I didn't cry last night. The Universe knows how many tears I have shed these last few years waiting for this adoption. But, it was there, nonetheless. We have received our pre approval and now I we are waiting for our Letter of Acceptance. We hope it comes soon.
Please keep all of the orphans of the world in your thoughts as you lay down tonight. And, keep of their caregivers in your thoughts as well.